Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Our number

Versus the 2006 Red Sox (10 games):

B.J. Ryan: 8 IP, 1 H, 0 BB, 0.038 BAA, 0.13 WHIP, 0 R
Vernon Wells: .400 BA, .449 OBP, 1.000 SLG, 11 R, 17 RBI, 8 HR

The bright side: the Sox only have to face them 9 more times.


  1. Can't come soon enough. And a day off tomorrow is looking better and better!

  2. Not to mention our pitching against Toronto:

    10 Games 89.2 Innings 3 wins 7 Loses 1.63 WHIP .307 BAA .927 OPS 6.22 ERA

    Compared to our pitching overall:

    50 Games 438.2 Innings 30 Wins 20 Loses 1.35 WHIP .262 BAA .768 OPS 4.62 ERA


  3. Holy crap. Via Deadspin, check out this Vernon Wells-obsessed blog. Wow.

  4. 10. Once when he was stranded in the middle of the Sahara Dessert, Vernon saved himself and forty children by building a hovercraft out of his own kidney.

    9. Rocky Balboa ate lightning and crapped thunder. Vernon eats lightning...and holds it all in, baby.

    8. Vernon Wells once won a staring contest against a statue.

    7. Vernon Wells can communicate with dolphins, and they are actually interested to hear what he has to say.

    6. There are eleven letters in "Vernon Wells". Think about it.

    5. Vernon Wells owns a chain of men's lingerie stores modeled after Victoria's Secret called Vernon's Hidden Agenda.

    4. Vernon Wells once hit a home run...with his mind.

    3. To win a bet, Vernon Wells once ate an entire bowling ball.

    2. If you don't vote for Vernon Wells, somewhere in the world, a puppy will explode.

    1. Every time you vote for Vernon, a Los Angeles Angel loses its wings!

    Vernon's Hidden Agenda would make a really good band name.

  5. My favorite part:

    (Rockin’ in the

    by Mellencamp)

    They’re coming from the cities
    And they’re coming from the smaller towns
    Beat up gloves with bats and players
    Goin crack boom bam

    Vernon’s goin to the Allstar Game
    Vernon’s goin to the Allstar Game
    Vernon’s goin to the Allstar Game, Yeah, Yeah!
    Vernon to the Allstar Game

  6. Also, X do you remember that time you taunted Shannon Stewart at Fenway by yelling something about how Vernon Wells was going to take his job. I seem to remember Shannon Stewart glaring into the stands. Sure enough, Shannon was traded that year to the Twins.

  7. It was actually Jose Cruz Jr that I taunted, but yes I remember it well. He was shell shocked. and sure enough Vernon wells did take his job the very next year.

    I wrote about that somewhere on this blog. Or maybe Andrew's.