Oh ho ho, I now see zat you Boston Red-Stockings have just made a, how-you-say, blockbusting trade for none other than Monseuir Eric Gagné! Zut Alors! Apparently six years without a French Canadian relief pitcher is a bit too mahch, no? My uncanny québécois skills of deduction lead me to zee conclusion zat it is actually me, Rheal Cormier, whom you miss, no? And yet, why is for you do not trade for moi? I have been here, in Cincinnatti, all zis time! But, it is I, Rheal Cormier, who will have zee final laugh. "Ha ha ha", I say.
...you filthy Americans, with your "bullpen help", and your "non-waiver trade deadlines", and your "fast cars", and your "deodorant". You make me, how you say, seeck to my belly. I go now.